I'm Pregnant! Month 1

Month 1

Wow, I’m pregnant again. It definitely feels different this time, it has taken longer to sink and it has taken longer for my excitement to peak. But it’s happening. 3 positive pregnancy tests, and my period is over a week late now. It’s still hard to believe, but my first appointment is in a week and a half and I’m starting to feel butterflies of nervousness and excitement. We have only told 3 people, none of whom are our parents. But I’m getting ahead of myself here!

How did I find out? Well, in June I absolutely swore I was pregnant. During the two week wait I was tracking my symptoms and journaling all about them. Headaches, waves of nausea, gas, fatigue, emotional, etc… I really thought I was pregnant. The day I was supposed to get my period, I tested negative. I held out some hope, but later that day I ended up getting my period. I was disappointed, and I prayed to the Lord to help me not feel so sad about it. I determined I wouldn’t read into any symptoms the next month, and I absolutely wouldn’t test early.

The first weekend of July I knew I would be ovulating, and we definitely had unprotected sex at the right time (obviously). But because I didn’t want to feel disappointed again, I kept telling myself that the likelihood of me being pregnant this month was slim to none. Thankfully right after, we went on a road trip for a week. This was a great distraction from even considering I was pregnant. I also had a few drinks on the trip which in hindsight, I feel awful about. The week we got home (the week before my period was to come) I had Sage full time from 8-5, and Asa and I were sick with a cold. I still wasn’t paying attention to my body because so much was going on. I chalked everything up to PMS and the cold. Saturday (the day of my expected period) comes, I’m wondering why everyone is over this cold but I’m not?! I still feel crummy and congested. I didn't test that morning (though I thought about it, but I just wanted to sleep in). In the afternoon, I was like, well, I guess it doesn’t hurt to test. Even though it’s the afternoon and it’ll probably be negative anyway. So, I went and took a test. I didn’t set a timer or anything, I was just going to fold some laundry and come back in a bit to check. A couple minutes later (not the full 5 minutes that you are supposed to wait), I walked to the bathroom to throw something away, and I barely glanced at the test. I see two lines, and I am in absolute shock. I started crying and shaking. I didn’t believe it was true at all, and I was also bummed that when I finally got a positive test, I wasn’t even recording it. In my shock and tears, I walked to Josh in the living room. He was playing video games and I said “Honey,” my voice thick with tears. He jumped up, immediately worried, and I said “I’m pregnant!” and immediately began to sob again. The rest of the day I remained in disbelief. It was crazy.

What’s different this time, so far? Well I have zero desire to tell anyone, except two special people in our life. My best friend Shana knows, because I told her she would be the first to know after Josh. We also told Jonathan and Abbey, mainly because we saw them in person and it wouldn’t be a good time to tell them later (seeing that the next time we see them will be at her baby shower). This is likely going to be my last pregnancy, and I just want to keep it to myself for a while, hold it close, and enjoy every moment. Including the waves of nausea and the fatigue. The only other person I may tell early is Kathleen, simply because I may need some days off for appointments or because I’m not feeling well.

This time I also have wonderings that there are two babies in my belly, whereas last time I thought there was no way I would have twins. I would say I have anxiety, but I really don't’t. I’m jsut sort of at peace and accepting that as a major possibility, and even maybe a scooch excited for that possibility? It would be kind of cool. I may feel more anxious closer to the ultrasound. I’m trying not to read into my symptoms much and psych myself out. The only way to truly know is through an ultrasound.

While I don’t want to tell my parents yet, I am really excited when the time is right. Especially because they pretty much think we won’t be having anymore kids for a good while yet. It’ll be fun to have the boys tell them sometime in late august/september.

Symptoms:

Right now, in this first month, my symptoms are minor. I don’t feel a ton of fatigue during the day, but when I go too long without eating it definitely hits me. When I am hungry, I am starving. I feel slow, dizzy, and exhausted. Once I eat I feel a lot better. While my fatigue only hits when I’m hungry, I have noticed it’s really hard to wake up. Hard to wake up in the moring, hard to wake up from naps.

This week (5) I have noticed some nipple and breast soreness, and a few more intense waves of nausea.

One of the biggest differences this time is that I am more achy sooner than I was last time. The week before I found out, I woke up in the middle of the night and my hips were aching so badly. When I woke up to move, I literally thought “Man, my hips hurt like they did when I was pregnant! That’s weird,” and a few days later I found out I am pregnant.

That’s about it for symptoms. I have my appointment at 7 weeks and I will update again once month two is over. I can already feel this pregnancy is unfortunately going to fly by. I need to make a list, haha. And take a belly picture!