Slumped

If you could ask me to tell you one word that describes the last 6 months, I would tell you “slump.” I’m sure if this space was more “popular” you would have noticed my absence a long time ago. I’ve posted scarcely and very half-heartedly. Nothing has inspired, nothing has sparked a creative idea in me. I’ve just been working, cleaning, cooking, and trying to slip in little adventures here and there. The month of June was wonderful. Full of camping fun, adventures, hikes through nature. In July I got reslumped, thanks to a wonderfully mediocre job at Starbucks working last shift and never seeing my husband. I thought my new job would get me out of the slump, but it seems that I’m still just as busy as before and twice as tired. I wish I could tell you that the slump is over and I’m 100% inspired to write here, but I’m not. Some switch got flipped and discouragement took over. Is my schedule really so jam-packed that I can’t find time to write? No. I’m just tired. When inspiration hits (which is rare) the energy to follow through is greatly lacking. Then I just think, “well, none of these thoughts are good enough anyway.” I remember the day that I was full of confidence in my writing, just last year. I think I know what happened. I put myself out there and tried. Not to just write for me. I wrote a piece, submitted it to a Christian blog, and thought it was really good. It wasn’t good enough for them, and I got an email saying it wasn’t chosen for that month. From there, I guess I just figured, why try? If those people don’t think my writing is good, then no body else does, either. I was tired of trying and just feeling like it wasn’t getting me anywhere. I guess I gave up. I didn’t come here to whine and complain about it. I just thought you should know where I’ve been. Dr. Seuss said un-slumping yourself Is never easily done, and that is true. But I’m going to try. Because I know that I enjoy writing, whether certain people think that or not, I should still do it. Not for you or for her, or to get a like, just because I enjoy it. So here is my commitment to coming back. I will be back, I will write. I do have ideas and some of them are good. I can’t promise I’ll be back next week. But I can promise I’ll be back way more often. Here’s to trying.